Explaining to kids how
and why
they become seriously ill
by Rabia Mills
How can one possibly
explain an illness to a child who is seriously ill from some sort of ongoing
disease? Insha Allah the following explanation given to a sick child
will show the Islamic perspective as well as provide an answer to this
question.
Picture this ... a very young child, of say about two-years, is playing
dangerously near a cliff and is just about to fall off. The mother sees
the child, and with her heart almost sunk into her stomach with fear for
her child's life, she runs over to the child, picks him or her up and then
starts to spank the child and at the same time cries, "Don't ever do that
again!" The child is very confused and thinks something like this: "Why
are you spanking me if you love me?" The two-year old, being so young,
is shocked by all of this and is unable understand why mommy is reacting
like this.
It is the same for the rest of us. Sometimes Allah gives kids difficult
things, like long illnesses, to overcome. He sees the danger that the child
might get into and so, just like the mother, He spanks him or her. This
is not punishment per se though, because He is preventing the child from
hurting or endangering themselves -- just like the mother with the two-year
old is doing. If He so chooses, He will let the child know why they must
suffer like that. One thing we do know however, is that He does this for
the child's benefit, even though on the surface it doesn't look that way.
Everything Allah gives us is a gift, but we don't know how or
why it is a gift, just like the little two-year old can't possibly understand
why his mother is reacting the way she does. In many ways though, the fact
that some children have been singled out for such a difficult ordeal like
severe sickness, is a very good sign from Allah. It shows that He has turned
with favour towards him or her. That is an incredible gift that most will
never know! That makes you [name
of sick child] very special. There is no doubt about
it, being sick is difficult, but if your illness causes you to turn more
towards Allah, it will be very good for you. Maybe if you were healthy,
you wouldn't turn towards Him and would do bad things. Not cool. All that
really matters is Allah. That is important to know.
The above
explanation was part of a response given to a personal friend of Rabia's
whose young teenaged daughter had just been diagnosed with a severe form
of Lupus as well as Reynaud's disease. The teenager was having problems
understanding why and how this was happening to her -- especially from
an Islamic perspective. We thought some of our website viewers might like
to read this. It was altered somewhat so as to protect the identities of
the people involved. For more information about Rabia's background, she
mentions a little bit about herself here.
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